Second Update

I have been asked by many close friends, family, acquaintances, and even people I don't know that have heard my sisters story, for continuous updates. So here it is, my niece Addy and brother-in-law Mark are home from the hospital and are still healing. The doctors can't believe how well Mark is doing He has been drinking a ton of Aloe juice, and wearing healing magnets on his burns which seems to be helping. Addy has a visiting nurse come to the house every day to bath her and take all the bad skin off of her. It is called debreeding. This is definitely the worst part of the day for anyone participating in or even witnessing. My sister and Mark have to help pin her down so that the nurse can scrape the skin off of her. She is given some codeine before this ordeal but it does not seem to help. Nobody can tell how much longer this will need to be done. She is looking better everyday but also seems to be bleeding more. They say this is o.k.

She is only 8 months old!! This could be considered a good thing. She will not remember this, or will she? The memory won't be there, but will there be some deep seeded pain left in her sub-conscious?? She is not sleeping at night like she used to. She was a perfectly perfect baby before all this. Now, my sister is up all night with her, standing by her crib with her hand on her tummy singing songs to her. If she stops, Addy starts screaming again. The doctor, when asked if the non-sleeping could be from the codeine, just looked at Mark and said, "how well have you been sleeping?" His response was "not well." Addy does not know why this has happened to her and does not understand why (does anyone?). She wakes to feel comforted by her Mommy and to make sure she is o.k. It will take awhile for her to feel safe and secure again. She will be o.k. and life will go on. It's amazing!! I have never felt so much emotion in my entire life and I am just her Aunt, and life goes on. We can be considered LUCKY, yipee!! But why did this have to happen in the first place??? My sister does not need to learn any lessons. She is a wonderful mother. She is appreciateive, compassionate, etc. It could have been a lot worse, they could have died, they could have been burned even worse, but why, why, why?? We may never know. I assume this is a stage in the healing process, asking the why's. Hopefully, once we get past it we can start looking forward with happiness. However, I think a feeling of grief will somehow always linger within. Will this in some way change little Addy's personality? I know it will change my sister, and her family, hopefully make us all stronger, more greatful and unfortunately MORE cautious.

Thanks to all for your prayers, concern, and compassion.

www.tutuboutique.com

Can you relate?

My husband has asked me to blog about something that will get all the mothers out there something to vent about. OK, I think this is easily done. How about we discuss the "mothers do everything better so why do we fathers need to even try" mentalility. My girlfriend called me the oher day. She needed to vent. She had been dealing with a sick and very miserable little girl all day. She got little Olivia into her nighttime bath and needed to run to the drug store for some medicine. She simply needed her hubby, father of her child, to watch Olivia for all of about 15 minutes. His reponse, "wait, can you just help me get her out of the tub and dressed before you run off." My response to this story, "WHAT!!" Meanwhile my husband is listening in on my phone call and yells in, "Give him a break, he probably doesn't know where the pajamas are." Are you Kidding me!! Olivia is almost 2. She has one bureau. Who doesn't put the pajamas in the top drawer? Peter does the same thing to me:

God forbid, if I am going out for all of about 2 hours with my girlfriends for dinner. I will have to get all the kids fed, dressed, and ready for bed. Why is this? Why can't they take charge? This kind of response would be nice, "honey, just go I can take care of our children, have a nice well deserved time to breath." Nope, instead I need to make everything as easy as possible for him, so he can relax and watch TV. When he goes out, there is not one thought of helping with the kids. He simply gives me a kiss, a big huge grin, and says bye, I love you, as he is skipping out the door.

Update

It is one week after the accident. My niece and brother-in-law are still in the hospital. Mark may be realeased as soon as tomorrow. Addy has about another week. I am feeling better about their recovery. They have improved a lot and continue to. I am very proud of my sister and Mark. They are being so strong. Right now, the hardest thing for Jen and Mark to bear is witnessing and participating in the debreeding of Addy's skin. They need to scrape all the dead skin off so she does not get infected. As you can imagine, this is excrutiatingly painful for her. Mark knows, he has to go through it everyday as well. His hands are the worst. They have lived a nightmare and continue to. However, there is also so much to be thankful for. They can actually be considered lucky. They are living and will eventually be fine. We are all hoping for minimal scarring on Addy. She is such a beautiful, happy, and strong little baby girl! Thank you Mark for saving her.

More thoughts: The distance is killing me. I booked a ticket and Jen told me to cancel it. She says she does not need me right now. I am also still nursing my baby that does not take a bottle and is not allowed in the hospital. Jennifer and Mark are lucky to have Mark's family and my mother there to help. But, I am her sister, her only sibling, I want to help. Can't wait to give her a hug!

Life Changing Seconds

I got a horrific call this morning!! My older sister, my only sibling, my best friend, told me that she was in the hospital with her husband and baby. She has two beautiful daughters. Ayden is almost 4 (5 weeks younger than my daughter) and Addison is 8 months (5 weeks older than my second son). Her husband, Mark, and Addisson were engulfed in flames during a family dinner at my sister's in-laws. Mark used his body to put the flames on his daughter out. They both have bad second degree burns all over there faces, hands, and arms. I feel sick, empty, useless, scared, worried, SAD! My sister and her family mean the world to me. This will hopefully be the worst event to ever take place in any of their lives. They will live, they will be ok. It will take days, months, then get easier, then take years, and it only took seconds to happen. Please pray, enjoy every second, and take nothing for granted!

Dinner

Oh boy!! My husband and I have agreed on this topic to blog about. We will seperately share our views and then see how they match up. Well, I am a stay at home mother of 3 so I guess it is more my responsibilty than my husband's. But I really dislike having to deal with it. Many days I am so busy working on www.tutuboutique.com, changing diapers, doing the dishes, laundry, picking up the house, Pre-school arts and crafts, nursing, paying the bills, breaking up fights, soothing a crying baby, feeding, & clothing and the lists goes on, that I don't have time or energy or desire to even think about the dreaded task of dinner. All day I am a slave to 3 of the most important people in my life, but by the end of the day I am ready for some kind of payback.

I know that sounds harsh. Considering my husband would be the only one that could actually help grant me some servitude. I mean he has been working all day too, right. Oh, give me a break! I mean he did get to drive to and from work alone in his car listening to his new Sirius radio that he loves, and I am sure he gets take out or even gets to go out for an occassional lunch date. He even has time to blog every day. It has taken me all day to write this one and I have been interrrupted already three times. David has not stopped reminding me that he needs help finding his new bouncy ball and Merry has announced from the bathroom that she is almost ready for a wipe. (Please forgive me if this is full of grammatical errors, spelling, punctuation, and everything else.)

So, at night I am so spent that I am happy with whatever is easy and fast. Kraft Mac & Cheese is my favorite. As long as the kids are fed a fruit and veggie and some sort of protein throughout the day, why can't Peter be ok with whatever we can muster up. I think he expects more. I say I cook a good meal about 2 times a week and another 2 days we go over friends and family's house. That leaves 3 days that I don't have a clue what we will be eating. I want Peter to accept this and hope he does. Right now, I am very close to a nervous breakdown. Merry won't stop whining over and over again, that she wants her Grampy, while David tries to crawl on me as I type. I only have 5 minutes before I need to get the kids in the car to get to an appointment to refinance. So, those are my quick thoughts on supper. Now to see what Peter wrote. Hopefully I won't have to @#@$^%*^% him.

Boys in Tutus

So, my 2 year old son David loves dresses in tutus, tiaras, and fancy girly shoes. Am I worried? Absolutely not!!! He is a boy through and through that is for sure. He has an older sister and loves to emulate her. It is interesting to me when I come across someone that thinks it is appauling to allow such behavior to occur. I mean, I truly believe that you are born with your own sexual identity and letting your boy dress in a tutu is not going change him into a homosexual. I actually think it may help nurture his feminie side, which all women love to see in a man. Let me just say that "tutus are not just for little girls anymore!!"

www.tutuboutique.com

Hello,
My name is Heidi Wonson. I am a mother of three children under the age of 4 and co-owner of www.tutuboutique.com. Needless to say, I have my hands full. I intend to use this blog as a venue to express my feelings, concerns, thoughts, etc. about being a mother.My husband has his own blog as well. We are going to choose a topic to discuss weekly and would love to keep it going with help from all of you who reach us. The interesting part is once my husband and I agree on a topic to discuss that is all we have to agree on. We will then seperately share our views. All of you will be able to see how both sides of the fence see the same issue. Who needs therapy when we can just blog it!